Stephanie Matto thought she was having a stroke, or a heart attack, or both. A pressure in her stomach was moving upward, making it hard to breathe and causing a pinching sensation in her chest. Her life was flashing before her eyes. 

After rushing to the hospital and undergoing a battery of tests, doctors (fortunately) didn’t find anything wrong with her heart. The diagnosis was intense gas pains caused by excessive demands at her job: selling farts in jars.

Matto, a 31-year-old Connecticut resident, was thrust into the global spotlight while starring on TLC’s reality show 90 Day Fiancé. She parlayed her success into a series of media ventures including a YouTube channel and an X-rated subscription site called Unfiltrd. But the real money came when she began jarring her flatulence and selling it to strangers on the internet for $1,000 a pop.

What originated as a publicity stunt quickly became a lucrative venture. At one point, Matto was pulling in $50K a week peddling her farts online. But as she climbed near the quarter-million mark in sales, the pressure mounted—mentally and physically.

Matto, a self-proclaimed “fartrepreneur,” had to churn out 50 jars of flatulence a week to keep up with her fans’ insatiable appetite for toots. To turn her body into a fart factory, she adopted a fiber-rich diet including black bean salads, onion-and-pepper omelettes, smoothies, yogurt, and protein muffins. 

Tragically, the diet that made her rich also made her sick—that’s how she ended up in the hospital on that fateful evening. Matto’s doctors recommended taking a gas suppressant medication, which effectively ended her gas-fueled career.

But like any savvy entrepreneur, she pivoted her business to thrive in the digital age. Right after the New Year, Matto announced she would sell cartoon images of her fart jars as non-fungible tokens (NFTs) on the Ethereum blockchain. The going rate is 0.05 ETH, roughly $200 each, and only 5,000 will be minted.

“These NFTs are just as beautiful, unique, and rare as my actual poots!” says Matto on her new website fartjarsnft.com. “You can practically smell how delightful they are through the screen. Just use your imagination! Fart jars are the true sign of going against the grain, being a trailblazer, and not caring about the opinions of others. Being the first ever fart jar mogul has put me on the map, and now it's your turn to be a part of my fart empire.”

Here’s a breakdown of what you can get for various amounts of Matto’s tokens:

10 = a real jar that Matto has queefed in

30 = used lingerie

70 = panties worn by Matto

100 = a real fart jar (now a rare item, in light of her recent health scare)

Token holders also get access to a private Discord channel, which already boasts a community of 3,000+ members. You can even be mentored on “how to build a brand, 'become a content creator, & become a fartrepreneur.”

The internet’s response has been a mix of excitement, confusion, outrage, and of course, horniness. Some reporters lamented Matto’s venture, calling it strange, disgusting, and sordid. “We live in hell,” said Tony Tran of Futurism.

If you’re not privy to the worlds of crypto or fart porn, Matto’s Fart Jar NFT project probably seems baffling. But in an age where people shell out real money for vagina-scented face masks and gamer girl bath water, it should come as no surprise that a social media star can make serious coin off JPEGs of fart jars.

Like anybody out there hustling to get their bag, Matto has to deal with haters.

“I have even received death threats, people telling me I should end my life, and so on. I try my best to not react to these people and give them what they want, which is attention,” Matto said in an interview. “In this day and age, we need to stop tearing people down for their choices. Especially if their choices are literally hurting no one.”

We couldn’t agree more. As dudes who got into the business of literally wiping asses for a living, we’ve faced our fair share of haters and naysayers. That’s why Stephanie’s story has a special place in our hearts at DUDE HQ. We’re glad her career got a second wind, and if her farts accidentally become sharts, we’ll always be there with our flushable wipes to help with cleanup duty.